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If you know someone who’s been engaged in the past few weeks or so, this may not be the best time waster to show them. Then again, if they have a sense of humor, they may appreciate it. In 5 Minutes to Kill Yourself Wedding Day, you can either choose to be the bride or the groom. You can dress up your characters (though it doesn’t really matter) and name them. After proposing at a bar, you find yourself at the altar and you’re having second thoughts. Instead of saying, “No, I don’t want to do this.” and going all Graduate at the wedding, you decide you have to kill yourself before this horrible process can complete itself. To do that, you’ll have to injure yourself enough so that you can die and avoid this awful mistake. That means searching the bathroom to eat urinal cakes or breaking up a cat fight. All of this is done by pointing and clicking and each act of anti-self-preservation does 7 percent or 5 percent damage. There really isn’t a lot of twitchy skill involved in this. And if you haven’t noticed by now, this is supposed to be a humorous game and you’ll get a kick out of all the ways you can hurt yourself. But it’s fun wandering around the church and seeing what a lit candle can do. As the title of the game implies, this will take under five minutes. At the wedding, you have to find a number of random knickknacks to hurt yourself with. The process can go faster if you find items that combo together for more damage.
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